These awkward photos brought to you by Mother’s Day

Long ago, I made a decision to never parent children, kind of because I don’t really like children very much, and kind of because I think I’d make a crappy parent.  If I can’t toss it in a crate in the back of the van to take it to agility class, I’m not real interested in it.  Children should be surrounded by people who want and love them, not short – tempered Food Ladies who find them even pestier than Dexter (and if Dexter ever learns to speak English, I’m breaking up with him for SURE).

However, no matter what you “parent” or are caregiver to, there are immense responsibilities involved.  Whatever it is you are minding, you must love it, care for it, tend to its needs, be a teacher, a coach and a support system.  It’s a lot of work, making sure you set someone up for success.  And there are lots of things you CAN’T do too, which is kind of a let down.

For example, it’s never okay to turn your puppy into an airborne pretzel for a photo opportunity.

Even when you are frustrated with them, it’s just bad form to hit them in the face with a basketball.

Especially not repeatedly.

Terrorizing them is never permitted.  Neither is making fun of them, even when they look ridiculous.

Hurling them off of hillsides – also frowned upon.

You can’t play favourites.

You must fairly settle all disputes among them.

And make everyone feel included.

It’s a lot of work, being a parent.  Fortunately my mother is fabulous and did an excellent job.  Thanks Mum, and Happy Mother’s Day!

Piper says I could have done a slightly better job, which is about what sums up our performance yesterday.  No Q’s – we fell victim to the  5 Fault Fumble – in every run, we made one single error.  My favourite was Piper’s beautiful, difficult weave pole entry in Master’s Standard, followed immediately by her turning around in the weaves and coming back to ask me if I’d seen how nice her entry was ;-)  But I am really proud of her efforts and overall performance.  She has come so far in such a short period of time!  The Sadist has been a (strange, scary etc.) blessing in our lives.

Tweed got to come to the trial yesterday to visit all of his friends and mooch for cookies (the pathetic tennis ball casted foot was a JACKPOT he discovered).  The only sad bit was as I was leading him back out to the car so he could rest in his crate, he tried to pull me into the Masters ring.  He thought he was going to run a course, and was completely depressed when I explained he couldn’t go play :(

However, our wonderful and thoughtful agility friends made it up to him by presenting us with a very sweet card depicting a vomiting seagull that hoped Tweed would feel better soon, and a generous wad of cash toward his veterinary bill.  I was just so touched by the gesture.  Thank you friends!!  You’re all fantastic people, and fantastic doggie parents too.  Happy Mother’s Day to all of you as well.

Now I am off to celebrate the day with my Mum.

Oh, I see.  You’re going out for the day and leaving us here with nothing but a basketball for company.  You’re the worst mother ever.  I snub thee.


  1. Happy Mother’s Day to you Food Lady!

  2. Whaddya mean I can’t do all those things? Ok that’s it – world, I officially want a refund!

    Well, maybe just this once we can let it slide.. but just because of the heeelarious pictures from 3WAAW today.

  3. riosmom says:

    I think you are right – you should never illustrate a children’s book. But I love, love your “how (not) to” lessons for dogs.

    Love your weave pole story, too. Gracie did the same recently but it was my fault for yelling “Yes!” when she made a really hard entry. Glad you are happy with your girl even when you don’t Q.

    Have a lovely day with your mother.

  4. Love your post! And that you’re a parent to the best kind of kids in the world – 4 leggers!! :-)

  5. Fabulous photos! Thanks for the laughs! And I second you on the kid thing……

  6. This whole post, and mostly that fourth picture, is just hi-la-ri-ous!!
    Congrats with the nice weave pole entry. ;)

  7. LaVonne says:

    Another really enjoyable blog entry, FL. Thanks.

  8. Happy Mothers Day Food Lady!

    You and your ‘kids’ are obviously very loved by your friends :)

  9. Great photos and commentary! The post is water out the nose funny today! (Glad I wasn’t drinking a soda!)
    I third you on the kid thing. But someday I’d love to be a grandma. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way. Especially since all my kids and spayed and neutered ;)

  10. “Neither is making fun of them, even when they look ridiculous.”

    I LOOOOOOVE this photo! OMG, the look on his face.

    I also love the very corner of one wild eye that you can see in the “. . . bad form to hit them in the face with a basketball.” photo.

    Ahh, another wonderful day with 3WAAW. :)

  11. dear dex. you are loved in the east (pack your bags and come now!)

    happy belated mother’s day!

  12. Umm Food Lady? I think we need a picture of that vomiting seagull card.

  13. riosmom says:

    I think we also need pictures of Piper doing agility. A video would be even better.

  14. I have SO missed my 3WAAW! (Internet down -ugh.)

    Love this entry!

    Dogs need to be handed out with a large dose of “sense of humor”. All the better to apreciate those moments that we could otherwise kill them. I mean really, that is so cute that Piper wanted to make sure you saw how well she had done! You have to laugh! (Or scream, but that’s where the sense of humor comes in.)

  15. Happy Mother’s Day! Love the photos, they are hilarious!

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