Holy Cow!

Tah-DAH!

Sorry.

Today we went to Dog Heaven in Ladner. With 10 border collies. That’s right, you heard me. TEN. And for the first time ever, I didn’t have the majority percentage! Today my foster home Hilary had us all beat with Cracker, Bo, Penny, Chance and Gracie.

Bo was adopted from TDBCR. He came with his own stick.

And he will get all up in yo bizness until you throw it for him.

Even if Penny harasses him about his obsession.

Penny was also adopted from TDBCR. She is lovely.

Tweed was miffed that she usurped his status as The Red Dog Present, and snubbed her.

But Piper slapped some sense into him.

“Manners, big oaf!”
“Hey, step off, beeyotch!”

Hilary also brought TDBCR foster Gracie, who I managed somehow to not take a single photograph of. Gracie is staying with Hilary for a week until she goes off to her forever home – she managed to get adopted before she was even available!

She also is fostering my favourite TDBCR rescue boy, Chance, the fella from Grand Forks I picked up last month.

Isn’t he handsome by halves though? Such soulful eyes.

Such a sexy physique

And talented? Whew! He even did some Vaudville for us!

yah-dadadada-dah

Jenn, Miss ME-ME-ME, was not impressed with all the attention Mr. Mad Skillz was getting.

Get out of my limelight, jerk!

Chance is now ready for a forever home of his very own. Tell your friends! He’s an absolute delight.

Am I doing a good job of selling this handsome devil??

***I interrupt these photo captions to ask you all a Very Important Question***

Why does Jenn torment Piper? I have owned border collies for many years, and it is my experience that frequently one will obsess over another. Briggs used to obsess over my older-than-him border collie Abi. Whatever she did do, he done did as well. Mr. Woo spends half his time pouncing on Piper. Sport went everywhere Tweed went.

But this is different. Jenn does not live with Piper, and she doesn’t want to do what Piper does – she wants to TORMENT her. She seems, actually, hell bent on driving Piper into a frothing, raging psychosis.

TEN dogs with us today, folks. TEN. And Jenn engaged in exactly one activity the entire time. I have no photos of it, but it goes like this:

*Ahem. Jenn Impression*

Look Piper, I have a stick. A stick. You want the stick don’t you? You want it. You totally want it. Come and get it. Get the stick. Here, I’m putting it on the ground and walking away from it. Just walking awa-HAH YOU IDIOT! YOU FELL FOR IT! YOU CAN’T HAVE THE STICK!! The stick is mine! But you want it, don’t you? What are you so mad about? What if I poke you with it? Like this. Hey? Hey? Do you like that? What if I dance with it? Does that bug you? Do you want it? Want the stick? I know you want it. Come get the stick. What are you, some kind of pussy? Oh you’re mad now, are you? HAHAHA that’s funny! Come here and say that to my face! Come here and say it to my face, and get the stick. This stick. This stick right here. Come on, I dare you.

*RAGE*

At one point, while Piper was standing still trying veryveryvery hard to ignore Jenn, Jenn snuck up behind her and BIT HER IN THE ASS. Srsly!!

I’ve seen nowt like it. Have you?

What? I’m not doing anything. *blink*

Piper was ready to throw herself under a train.

Mr. Woo, on the other hand, was just plain excited to see Auntie Robyn.

BONZAI!

Until he saw the eagles.

I think he ate one.

It’s thirsty work, eating all the eagles.

Does the thought of 10 border collies make you tired? How about 7?

It exhausts me!

I’m thinking hamburgers for dinner. How about you?

Tune in next week, when Donutz will show us all how to make Pan Fried Hamster Snackz!

Say a little prayer for MC Hamster ;-)

If Gandalf Humped A Mop*

The result would be Wootie’s new boyfriend.
Work your magic on me baby

Oh you made me levitate! Good work, GandalfMop!

Now he has the courage to take on Mad Teeth(tm)!

Except … they ARE rather frightening

It may be time to retreat

Even scarier than the Original Mad Teeth(tm) are the miniature version.

Mostly because they bite. They especially bite their large, fuzzier doppelganger.

Do not chase me.

I WILL rip your beard off, doppelganger!

NINJA MINI MAD TEETH CAN LIFT 6 TIMES HER OWN WEIGHT!

You have to feel sort of sorry for wee Harriet, because *everyone* chases her. Everyone big, that is.

But no worries! Parker The Super Greyhound is rushing to her little sister’s rescue!

I (and my FABULOUS ass) am coming, Harry!

The rescue was going well, until … Parker met her nemisis (cue ominous music).

It was … AVIS.

Oh sure, she looks cute and innocent right? But Avis, as her mum says, maintains a “B(itch) Plus Average.” She kicked the hell out of poor Parker.

Parker tried to run her out of town

But only one emerged victorious

In fact, the only dogperson Avis did not try to take on was Jenn. Because Jenn is scary.

Just ask Tweed.

I am coming for you Tweed. You will not know when, you will not know how … but I WILL annihilate you

Run away! Run away!

The Matriarch, Luna, observed the others with weary disdain.

Oh foolish youth.

It’s such hard work, being so awesome and wise. Also, it was pretty windy.

Mr. Woo soon grew tired (don’t ask me how, it’s not as though he actually did anything resembling exercise today) and was dreaming …

… about how he could get his own fluffy Aussie cloud flotation device

Pretty soon Parker was down for the count too. She took a break … as did Robyn. Weird.

The border collies, however, took no prisoners.

Well, except Jackie and her Chuck-It.

THROW IT!THROW IT!THROW IT!THROW IT!THROW IT!

Until it was time to go…East. Parker said we should go East.


The best part about today’s outing … 3 totally zonked out, sandy, too-tired-to-move dogs! ZOMG! They only woke up long enough to eat dinner, and they are all asleep again.

*today’s title brought to you by Robyn, Jenn and Luna’s mum!

Let This Be A Lesson To You

KARMA

If you are rude to your mop

You may fall on the floor

GRACE

Sometimes you haz it

Sometimes, not so much.

FACEPLANT!

Beware of imitations

Showing off can be hazardous to, err, gravity?

It is a beautiful day in the neighborhood, dear readers! The problem is, my neighborhood is dullsville. So we went to Kits Beach to enjoy the sun.

And was it ever MY lucky day.

ZOMG! The Cute!

Every day can be made better by a cute puppy sighting.

Please to love me now? kthx

We even got to see some old friends.

Do your ears hang low

Do they wobble to and fro

Can you tie ‘em in a knot?

Stop singing. Your voice makes me angry.

Piper needs to take better care of her Mad Teeth ™! That big gap is not very flattering. It’s where the one we had removed when it got broken by the caribiner used to live. The rest of her teeth are sharpened from years of chewing on everything that fits in her mouth, so giving her a cookie is like grabbing Edward Scissorhands.

Stop making fun of my sister. Got it?

It’s been busy busy here at the House of Three Woofs. We’re gearing up for the AAC Regionals in May, so we’ve upped our training to 2 nights a week. Of course, all practice areas are a kazillion miles away, so they make for looong days.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch …

Donut is still trying to eat MC Hamster

So she needed some “Corporal Cuddling“.

As soon as you let me up, you’re dead meat, lady.

Oh brother.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Wootie is full of fun! May your weekend also be full of laughs!

XO